wedding planning

being engaged is as fun as i expected it to be and then some - and the same with wedding planning. i'm remembering why i wrote in my sixth grade yearbook bio that i wanted to be a wedding planner. what a goober. clearly i watched "father of the bride" a little too much growing up.

i'm also starting to understand why everyone freaks out and gets stressed about planning a wedding. add that to the growing list of "things people always told me but i refused to believed." you know what i mean? those things that everyone tells you and then in the throes of whatever it is you wonder why no one ever warned you about it, until you remember they did and you refused to believe it.

besides not being able to set a date until we know a few more things about lance's military schedule - a legitimate obstacle, the other "obstacle" is one i have created: the paradox of chelsea.

i sometimes have really expensive taste and can quickly become enamored with beautiful and exquisite wedding things. but just as quickly i become overwhelmingly guilty and the thought pounding in my head is, "how can anyone spend that much money for ONE DAY?!"

for instance, after touring a fantastic wedding venue, i happily thought that with the military discount they were offering us it wouldn't be too terribly outrageous. blame it on my eternal optimism, blame it on my lack of even attempting to do some quick mental math before i let myself consider the venue, but when i put the numbers into my calculator, i was dismayed at the total. gag. it sent me into a wedding planning slump as i revisited the idea of eloping for the umpteenth time.

i'm weird. i know.

but i just want to get married. i'm not writing this post because it has any significance or is really of interest to anyone. i want to write it down so i remember it. things change before you know it and no matter what there is always so much to be thankful for.

before i know it, our wedding will be here and then gone. but writing about it will let me look back and laugh at thoughts that crossed and/or consumed my mind like ...

• how much is too much to spend on a wedding gown? on a wedding?
• how/when did i get this old?
• does lance really know what he's getting into? mainly: does he realize how long it could take before i am actually good at cooking?
• my family should go into a vintage wedding rental business. popular businesses like magpie vintage rentals make me laugh. everything they have to rent out i could borrow from someone in my family. we rocked vintage before it was trendy, or heck, before it was vintage. however, i'm not necessarily crazy about the vintage wedding trend.
• is there any way i can get my hair to grow faster?
• i love that lance said he loves listening to me talk about wedding stuff. and that he pretty much gives me free reign.
• an amazing photographer from seattle that i emailed just for kicks said he would waive travel fees to shoot our wedding in lancaster because he loves this area (and taking pictures here) so much. how cool is that? i'm not planning on hiring him, but it was a great reminder of how very blessed i have been to be born and raised in beautiful lancaster county.
• being engaged has me thinking a lot about heritage too, and how thankful i am for mine. i love that my family's history is deep roots in a beautiful land, and an even richer heritage of faith. it's comforting and inspiring.
• even though i'm not really an animal person, i keep thinking about having a dog in my wedding. particularly a bulldog in a bowtie. lance confirmed for the millionth time that he is the man of my dreams when he suggested we find two - a bride and groom bulldog! best idea ever, lance! he of course was joking, but i was not.