i'm all over the place with this one

“A child kicks his legs rhythmically through excess, not absence, of life. Because children have abounding vitality, because they are in spirit fierce and free, therefore they want things repeated and unchanged. They always say, “Do it again”; and the grown-up person does it again until he is nearly dead. For grown-up people are not strong enough to exult in monotony. But perhaps God is strong enough to exult in monotony. It is possible that God says every morning, “Do it again” to the sun; and every evening, “Do it again” to the moon. It may not be automatic necessity that makes all daisies alike; it may be that God makes every daisy separately, but has never got tired of making them. It may be that He has the eternal appetite of infancy; for we have sinned and grown old, and our Father is younger than we. The repetition in Nature may not be a mere recurrence; it may be a theatrical encore. Heaven may encore the bird who laid an egg.” [G.K. Chesterton]

i love g.k. chesterton quotes. that's from his book "orthodoxy" which i sure haven't read but it makes me want to. except i've heard his books are reallly hard to read through and honestly, i'm not that into reading hard books. i'm an english major but i find my classmates discussions in all of my lit classes to be a giant bore. i have more of a knack for reading books that end up turning into great movies.

but i guess great movies is relative, and i should clarify that i mean all things nicholas sparks or "the time travelers wife," which i think everyone besides me hated. (also "the babysitters club movie," which i own, but that confession is neither here nor there.) i'm not into classic books that get turned into epic movies. not even "pride & prejudice." the book was okay, the movie was okay, but i just don't get the obsession. and i should actually clarify again that not all books-gone-movies steal my heart, because i did not read or watch "twilight" and contrary to the belief of the annoying boy who told me i need to stop doing things "just to be different," i actually just don't like vampires. (and then he got all surprised when i said i love yellow lab puppies because that's what everyone loves. which should have proved to him that i do what i like, regardless of popular opinion. ugh.) i think the concept of a romance with a vampire is weird, and i think i'm entitled to that opinion as much as girls everywhere are entitled to devote themselves to team edward or team jacob. and i am once again entitled to think it's all a little crazy.

it worried me when i first realized what a peculiar english major i was, and i questioned whether i should switch to something else, but it's okay because 1) your college major is not that important in the big picture of life 2) while i don't adore classical literature, i think the way my eyes lit up when i saw a class called "transformational grammar" makes me a pretty good candidate for my major and 3) being a bit paradoxical is biblical. all of life in the spirit is paradoxical. we have to give to receive, die to live, and God is a righteous judge who demands the death penalty for sin BUT paid it Himself. we live in the tension of knowing God has plans for our entire lives, and yet He wants us to be led by His Spirit every moment of each day. none of this paradoxical business really has anything to do with me and my major ( ... except that i so often feel like such a paradox), it's just stuff i've been learning ... and i like it!

i also really like this whole blog post by beth moore's daughter, melissa - that's where i got that chesterton quote, as well as the following ...

"What if, instead of dreaming about how bright the city lights are in Bangkok, or longing for a cool starry night out on a ranch out in Montana, I took notice of the way the sun dances on my old cracked hardwood floors from the hours of 6-8 pm, as if they were its vintage stage? What if, each time I saw a butterfly, I imagined God standing at an easel painting the delicate and intricate patterns displayed on its wings? Or, what if, instead of being annoyed by the boisterous giggling of two people in my local coffee shop, I thanked God for the gift of laughter and comic relief or imagined the kinds of things that may bring a smile to His face. I wonder what my life would be like if I used my overactive imagination, not to daydream about far away lands or fantasy peoples, but to make sense of and delight in my own little world and the people I encounter on a daily basis."

i am always looking for ways to utilize my "overactive" imagination, except i prefer not to call it overactive. i think overactive is a cap the world tries to put on creativity, and when walking with God you really can't have too wild or crazy of an imagination. preachers emphasize learning faith and trust from kids, but what about using their awesome imaginations as a springboard for ours? i want to get MORE imaginative as i get older, not less! what if the things you imagined as a kid were only the beginning? what if they were telling of a future and destiny far more fulfilling than conforming to any american dream? i love the image of God 'painting the delicate and intricate patterns' of a butterfly. once i heard someone say they hoped their job in heaven would be painting the sunsets and i silently prayed i would get a cool job like that too. maybe helping to make the waves in the ocean or coming up with new COLORS. the idea that there are more colors in heaven than on earth ... well, i love it! and believing we have the authority to bring the kingdom of heaven to earth, makes me excited to see what God is going to do through my whole life - the mundane and the marvelous, the faraway future and the right now.