SURPRISE!

"chelsea you're a prayer warrior." "who said that dad?" (i knew he wouldn't have told me that off the cuff - not his lingo at all.) "ohh that's a secret ..." "DAD! WHO?"
and so goes a typical conversation with my dad.
"chelsea i saw your friends today ..." "who?" "ohh just guess ..." "MOM! WHO?"
and so goes a typical conversation with my mom.

my parents are both all about the little secrets and the surprises. and i absolutely LOVE surprises. it's not like they ever threw me a huge surprise party or bought me a legendary surprise gift or anything like that. but they work suspense into the day to day of life in such a way that i think it was inevitable for me to wind up this way. i used to think everyone loved surprises as much as me, but i don't think so anymore.

one time a guy who was in love with my friend told her that he had a surprise for us. (sometimes i get dragged into random events? haha) she couldn't have cared less about him or the surprise. naturally, all day i could only think about the surprise. "chelsea, who freaking cares? it's going to be so lame anyway! who does that? how old does he think we are?! this guy is weird." "maybe. but what do you think it is?! i mean, it could be anything!"

i think the suspense is what makes surprises good, even if the surprise itself isn't that extraordinary. same with life: suspense = fun. why would you want to know everything that's going to happen? it's so much more fun to be surprised. and don't even get me started on surprising others. sometimes i like to do it intentionally but i think i've created a habit of it without realizing it. last week my friends and i were talking about the future and someone said that it would be just like me to not tell anyone that i was pregnant until i started showing. i couldn't stop laughing when she said that, because that idea never occurred to me, but it definitely inspired me. they said they'd be mad, but i'm not sure why? (okay maybe i see why. just a little bit.)

i'm also not sure why everyone wants to live life the same way? let's all force ourselves to go to wedding showers and baby showers, tradition, tradition. and if i'm the only one who hates them, it shouldn't bother anyone that i don't go because they'll be having the time of their life without me. there's got to be an alternative ... pending on money, blasted money ... when i'm engaged maybe i'll have a pre-wedding yacht excursion. tanning, fishing, no group games, floating on the water past sunset with lots of twinkly lights and laughter. or a backyard concert. or a private dolphin show where everyone gets a chance to swim with the dolphins. or be kissed by the sea lions, i've always wanted to do that but so far i've never been chosen from the audience.

and for a baby shower? rent out a spa or something. and i will be the one full of surprises. "oh wow thank you for this diaper genie, instead of a thank you card i got you a diamond necklace. yes, tiffany's. they gave me a discount for buying in such a mass quantity. what's that? you're feeling bad that all you got me was a freaking diaper genie that i don't really know what to do with? sure you can make it up to me by babysitting every friday night for free, absolutely ..." and the food at this shenanigan will be incredible, because by that time i will have invented desserts that are delicious, full of essential vitamins and antioxidants, and produce negative calories. like you chew celery and burn calories, only you will be eating this cheesecake or triple chocolate something but it will make your skin radiant, your hair shine and your muscles defined. (come to think of it, this invention alone will probably provide more than enough funds for ALL of these joyful events ...)

but that's just off the top of my head ... i wouldn't want to have it all figured out now.