winter olympics and preparing for childbirth

These commercials are the best.

Makes me so excited for the winter olympics … and to be a mom!

A few days after I posted about strangers not commenting on my belly size, a stranger on the sidewalk yelled, "OH MY GOSH IS IT TWINS?! … WHAT?! Girl, that is a BIG baby! Congratulations!" 

Less than an hour later a man said, "Any day now, huh?" I absentmindedly said yeah, because I had no idea what he was talking about, but then I said, "Actually no, not until February 16." His eyes got huge and he said, "Woooooo, my. Bless your heart!"

The other night Lance was picking something to read the baby from the Bible and I told him to read from where I was in my chronological Bible, because I hadn't read yet for that day. (I just started reading through the Bible chronologically this year, and I'm loving the fresh perspective - highly recommend it.) Naturally it was Genesis 22 - where Abraham is tested and takes Isaac up the mountain to kill him. We both looked at each other and could not stop laughing. Definitely not a Bible story that comes to mind to read your baby, but nonetheless he heard it. Here's to a baby who will live with radical obedience like Abraham.

We had our first of two "Preparing for Childbirth" classes this week. I debated taking any class at all, because so many people said childbirth classes aren't that great, and to skip it. So instead of taking it through the hospital, we did it at this amazing birth resource center where I go for prenatal yoga.

I loved it and am so glad we chose to go there. Our teacher is a doula, her husband is military, and they have four kids - including twins. She was telling us about one of her twins being just like her, and such a little punk. "She loves to do this thing where she pretends to be asleep, but she's not …"

Lance and I looked at each other and cracked up, because one of my favorite things to do (not sure why I'm admitting this on the internet) is to pretend I fell asleep. I used to do it to my mom all the time (not just as a kid, but all the way through college), and I still love doing it to Lance.

I considered telling her that I pull the exact same trick as her four-year-old daughter, but I had already made her laugh enough when I told her that I had learned one of the relaxation techniques she mentioned from an American Girl book. She said that was the best thing she'd heard all day. ;) 

The technique is to tighten/clench all of the muscles in your body and then release them one by one. It was in American Girl's Care and Keeping of You book, which I used as an exhaustive resource when I was 12. 

I am thinking baby will arrive on Valentine's Day … or be a week late.

I will be surprised if he weighs less than eight pounds.

Lance was 8lbs 8oz, and I was 10lbs 2 oz, sooo we'll see.

lone survivor, etc

we saw lone survivor tonight and it was INCREDIBLE. 

not the best movie to see when you're pregnant - i was crying, and had to charge out of the theater afterward to pee. but there were a ton of other women in the bathroom crying too. the joy of a military town. maybe there were that many tears across the rest of the country as people came out of theaters.

lance read the book and said they did a good job with the movie. a high compliment coming from him considering he goes on missions like that, and he is very critical of military movies. naturally it gave me even more respect for him and what he does … i can't even wrap my mind around it. he is strong, brave, just amazing.

i told him i want that movie to be playing while i give birth, because it would keep my mind off of it and their attitudes while they go through everything are just amazing.

mark wahlberg is pretty great, and so is taylor kitsch, (aka tim riggins from my favorite show on netflix - friday night lights.)

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speaking of netflix … watch this movie. if you've ever had a fleeting thought about going to sea world, you'll never want to go again after watching this.

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this is a delicious soup recipe if you're in need of something new and hearty.
and it is husband approved. which again says a lot, because normally soup would not be enough to fill him up, but this did the trick.

zuppa toscana
{via bento bloggy}

1 lb italian sausage
4 russet potatoes
1 large onion, chopped
8 slices bacon, chopped & cooked
4 cloves of garlic, minced
4 C chicken broth
2.5 C water
2-3 C kale, sliced into ribbons
1/2 C heavy cream
salt + pepper to taste

remove sausage from casings and brown in pan with olive oil. add onions and bacon. cut potatoes into quarter inch pieces and add potatoes, garlic, salt + pepper to pot with sausage, onions and bacon. pour in chicken and water and bring to boil. simmer on low for an hour, or until potatoes are tender. add spices if desired. add kale and cream, simmer and serve.

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and this is just funny ...

35 weeks

tomorrow marks 35 weeks. i'm starting to wonder if i'm having twins. i feel huge. this week i have started to feel uncomfortable a lot. it's becoming difficult to sleep, and i have pain that comes and goes through the days and nights.

people have said, "enjoy your sleep now!" quite a lot to me during my pregnancy. i've always enjoyed my sleep, and i'm trying to take their advice now and not take it for granted. but frankly, the time to tell people to enjoy their sleep is before they are pregnant. it's tricky to get comfortable and to change positions. i consistently wake up every few hours to pee. and i realize all of this is still easier than waking up to take care of a baby … but it's still uh, not the best sleep of your life.

thus far, i have been very pleasantly surprised by the LACK of crazy comments and random belly rubs from strangers. people have only said kind things, and only one stranger asked to touch my stomach. it was a teacher at school, so i didn't even mind. she told me to pack my hospital bags, because i would be going into labor any day … and that was at the beginning of december, so that has probably been the only semi-crazy comment from a stranger.

comments from students at school have been the best. "is there a baby in there?" "how'd it get in there?" "how will he get out?" "i hope your baby behaves!" "why would you want a baby?" when they ask the name and i say it's a surprise, their faces light up. they almost always suggest i name the baby after their sibling. nonchalantly like, "i have a baby brother named ian, so i guess you could name your baby that …" i love watching how their minds work.

as much as i know how blessed i am to be pregnant, and that bringing a new life into this world is a MIRACLE, and any changes to your physical body are more than worth it … it still sucks feeling/being fat. i miss feeling cute. yesterday i saw myself in a mirror while i was eating and just felt disgusted. so clearly i have not embraced the beauty of pregnancy the way many women seem to.

i've been thinking about women who say they love being pregnant ... and i officially do not understand, relate to, or agree. do they forget everything? or do they genuinely love it?

the up side of not feeling cute is saving money, because i'm sure as heck not shopping for myself. i only bought a few maternity clothes, and it's kind of nice having less to choose from when you're getting dressed. it helped that my stepsister had a ton of maternity clothes that she let me sort through, so i got some new treasures to add to my maternity mix when i was in pennsylvania in december.

if i end up missing anything about being pregnant, i think it will be feeling our baby move inside of me, and having him so close and safe. and the ease of getting around without a baby in tow. pregnancy has been wonderful for my hair, and i feel like it's been one good hair day after another - love that. special treatment from strangers is nice too. people are super friendly, and quick to get out of your way - which i like.

i miss working out, so i'm excited for my fitness plans for after baby arrives. (and to sleep on my stomach again - i think i miss that the most.) i still exercise, but it's not the same. i'm holding my exercise ideas with an open hand because who knows what i will feel like, or how long until i kick back into gear.

there is so much mystery with your first pregnancy. probably with every pregnancy. it's a process and miracle as old as time, but still new every time. i like that. i have so many questions and curiosities. when will he come? what will giving birth be like? what will he look like? how big will he be? what will he be like?

so many friends have said the first month (or several) of having a newborn have been some of the hardest ones of their marriage, and that scares me because i already think marriage is hard work. i think SIDS and postpartum depression are my biggest fears, and it makes me sad that i will be so far away from my family. what if there's no one to babysit and i start to go completely crazy being with a baby all the time?

i don't know, but i will stop worrying. like my last post said: worrying is like praying for what you don't want. life is hard, but there is so much joy. i am confident that our baby will bring joy unlike any i have known or experienced so far - and my life has already been full of so much joy.

having the basics of what we need for the baby makes me giddy with excitement too. i did a lot of research about baby gear because 1) i am a nerd and love to research, and 2) i am a minimalist and hate clutter, excess, and hoarding. i like to keep life simple and organized. i'm so happy with the gifts we got and what i found at yard sales and consignment shops. now i just have to resist the temptation to buy cute outfits and shoes, when what we'll really need are practical items like diapers and wipes. ;)

i keep saying this to all of my pregnant and mom friends, but i'll say it again: i love this season of life. it seems like suddenly i have tons of friends who are pregnant or having babies. i even squealed when i was walking at the park one day and another girl walked by and said to me, "i'm pregnant too!" she wasn't showing at all, but she was overjoyed and i was thrilled for her.

it's an unmatched feeling of anticipation and excitement … and still feels surreal that in five weeks (give or take) our baby boy will be here.

things to let go of

This list of 20 Things To Let Go Of Before The New Year by Shannon Kaiser, posted on MindBodyGreen, really resonated with me. I highlighted a few that really stuck out for me. Particularly #5: Worrying is like praying for what you don't want. So true! All of that energy could be invested into prayer … way more productive! What sticks out to you?

1. Let go of all thoughts that don't make you feel empowered and strong.

2. Let go of feeling guilty for doing what you truly want to do.

3. Let go of the fear of the unknown; take one small step and watch the path reveal itself.

4. Let go of regrets; at one point in your life, that “whatever” was exactly what you wanted.

5. Let go of worrying; worrying is like praying for what you don’t want.

6. Let go of blaming anyone for anything; be accountable for your own life. If you don’t like something, you have two choices, accept it or change it.

7. Let go of thinking you are damaged; you matter, and the world needs you just as you are.

8. Let go of thinking your dreams are not important; always follow your heart.

9. Let go of being the “go-to person” for everyone, all the time; stop blowing yourself off and take care of yourself first … because you matter.

10. Let go of thinking everyone else is happier, more successful or better off than you. You are right where you need to be. Your journey is unfolding perfectly for you.

11. Let go of thinking there's a right and wrong way to do things or to see the world. Enjoy the contrast and celebrate the diversity and richness of life.

12. Let go of cheating on your future with your past. It’s time to move on and tell a new story.

13. Let go of thinking you are not where you should be. You are right where you need to be to get to where you want to go, so start asking yourself where you want to go.

14. Let go of anger toward ex lovers and family. We all deserve happiness and love; just because it is over doesn’t mean the love was wrong.

15. Let go of the need to do more and be more; for today, you've done the best you can, and that's enough.

16. Let go of thinking you have to know how to make it happen; we learn the way on the way.

17. Let go of your money woes — make a plan to pay off debt and focus on your abundance.

18. Let go of trying to save or change people. Everyone has her own path, and the best thing you can do is work on yourself and stop focusing on others.

19. Let go of trying to fit in and be accepted by everyone. Your uniqueness is what makes you outstanding.

20. Let go of self-hate. You are not the shape of your body or the number on the scale. Who you are matters, and the world needs you as you are. Celebrate you!

recently read for january 3, 2014

Supernatural Childbirth

By Jackie Mize

I love this book. More than encouraging, and dripping with truth and excellent scriptures and promises. 

The Middle Place

By Kelly Corrigan

Amazing memoir about a father and daughter's journeys with cancer. She captures the feelings of that "middle place" perfectly - being in her thirties with a husband and two kids, but still loving that feeling of being a child again in the presence of her own parents, and the fear of losing them. Her stories about her dad and her own life are fantastic. A really great book!

Outliers

By Malcolm Gladwell

Gladwell is one of my favorite writers and I was surprised to find out recently that he was actually raised Mennonite. He takes seemingly obscure situations and pieces them together in a way that makes you think about the world differently. Outliers looks at the idea of success, and through fascinating stories in history, Gladwell shows us that our understanding of success is skewed. Success is not so much the result of a person's ambition or intelligence as it is the combination of those things with the opportunities a person is presented with at the right time. You'll learn about everything from what a pilots culture has to do with plane crashes, to why Asians are better at math, to why the Beatles and Bill Gates were so successful when plenty of other "geniuses" aren't. The second part of the book focuses on legacy. I loved the whole thing - read it!

Dad Is Fat
By Jim Gaffigan
This book is HILARIOUS. Jim Gaffigan is one of my favorite comedians and I laughed the whole way through. Most of the stories are about his life as a husband and father of five kids living in a two-bedroom apartment in New York City. (I think the title was inspired by a caption his son wrote on a picture he drew of the family.)

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth

By Ina May Gaskin

I made my way through this book slowly, over the course of a few months because the first half is full of birth stories. Ina May Gaskin is a well-known midwife who started a place called The Farm, where women can go to deliver babies naturally. Super encouraging to fill my mind with one positive, natural birth story after another. I would recommend to just about any pregnant mama. (Maybe even papas, but be warned there are some crazy pictures.) I learned more from this book than any other pregnancy books or sites.

Blink
By Malcolm Gladwell
I didn't like this as much as Outliers, but it was still a great read. Gladwell uses amazing, intriguing examples from different areas of life (sports, classical music, war, racism, emergency rooms, etc.) to discuss our ability to make judgments in a few seconds. It confirmed things I've always thought about first impressions and just knowing things without being able to explain why. Our tendency in this information saturated age is to explain things about statistically, or to attribute disasters to a lack of information, but Gladwell points out that often times understanding trumps information. (And too much information can become a bad thing.) I like how his discoveries can be applied practically, and that he charges readers to act.