a bunch of randomness ... and lance

do you ever have something you need to do, but because you don't want to do it, you keep putting it off? and in it's place you find a hundred other things, less urgent, to do instead?

i need to write a paper but i'm feeling uninspired. my last semester of college has been exhausting, to say the least, and even though i know i will miss it and it's been an amazing season, i'm ready for it to end. i have seven major papers (10+ pages apiece) and several other minor ones to write before graduation in three weeks.

you'd think i wouldn't want to write on my blog too because i'm on writing overload, but i'm hoping some random word vomit will get me into gear. most of the time i am too tired to write on my blog too - hence the lack of posts, so i apologize.

and now for the word vomit ...

• i was afraid that my almost nonstop gym clothes wearing phase (aka the last two years of college) would yield negative results, but it has turned out to be just the opposite. people say if you wear sweats all the time you will gain weight and not notice. nope. i've been whipping out the old business clothes from my banana republic style phase for job interviews and such ... and they're too big! love that.



• i'm still learning the power of words. a major theme in my life. sometimes i want to be a motivational speaker. sometimes i mess up MAJORLY and realize without a doubt my words have an effect. it's easier for me to notice the negative effect they have than the positive. i really need to be careful. while i feel like i do exhort people, the nasty side of that is when i get angry i say awful stuff. this post at the sanctified pearl blog spoke right to me.
  



• why why WHY do people in lancaster drive so slow? this is a great time to practice holding my tongue. thanks for the setup God, very funny. ;-)



• another thing i'm learning is to guard myself. i'm not sure if this is good or not, it's something i'm processing and trying to "find the balance in." i feel like in the past i was too quick to pour out my soul to just about anyone who would listen. and get carried away. this goes along with the power of words thing.
  



• politics, schmolitics. i am so over all the legalities and formalities everyone dances around. i am so disgusted by the systems set up to supposedly protect and serve the people. reformation is needed, along with deep conviction and a willingness to stand up for truth every single day! here's an article from the nytimes that made me think - especially the challenge he poses at the end: let's ask ourselves "how to overcome our natural tendency to evade and self-deceive."



• whenever justin bieber and selena gomez show up on my computer i feel OLD. i am about to turn 24, i'm way too young to feel old.



• handwritten thank-you notes are NOT out of style and should not be ignored. etiquette is timeless. a huge thank-you to brides who actually still write thank-you's because it means something and it's worth your time no matter how annoying or silly it might seem.



• parenthood is my new favorite TV show, even though i've only had the chance to watch it once all season. i've realized that family is my passion. i love my family, and i can't wait to have a family ("can't wait" is a terrible phrase i overuse by the way - i can definitely wait, i will not go get knocked up after i type this blog, all i mean is that i am extremely excited for that time of life), but i also love hearing about other people's families and observing how they've been shaped by their families.



• i was highly disappointed to learn that plato thought families should be dispersed and everyone should live in community, with women mothering everyone - instead of children in specific family units with parents in monogomous relationships. maybe 'disgusted' is more fitting than 'disappointed,' especially because he thought once women became mothers they became inferior rather than equal to men. i was thisclose to raising my hand and expounding about the nobility of motherhood, the inestimable importance of family, and the fact that a woman can be very intelligent and still "just" want to be a mom. insert a mental snapshot into your mind of a livid chelsea, because that discussion put me on edge.
  



• an obnoxious plea as christmas approaches: don't buy too much junk! that cleverly packaged whatever-it-is might look great in the store, but do you/they really need it? working at thrift store is fun, but also eye opening to how much junk people have. you might want to stop reading because here comes the grinch: all those $5 gift exchanges you coerce others into (or are coerced into) ... just think about it. in terms of practicality and how money adds up and the big picture and who that money could be helping.



• along with that: don't donate mattresses, used peanut butter jars, broken appliances, dirty socks (dirty anything really) or jean jumpers to thrift stores. jean jumpers never stop coming in and i don't understand how people still have them. there are certain things that just need to be taken out of the cycle. throw it out. and if you're wearing a jean jumper while you're reading this, i don't know what to say.
  

and here's my boyfriend and me after a 5k we ran for fun. that was obvious when i tapped someone next to me at the start of the race to ask, "this is just three miles right?" that made those serious gameface runners laugh. people take things so seriously, i don't get it.

lance is home for two blissful weeks before he is deployed to afghanistan again. pray for him and everyone else in the military whenever it crosses your mind. he is a man who goes above and beyond in everything he does. the level of discipline in his life seriously inspires me and motivates me to work harder and reach my highest potential. one of his things is taking care of people - he will do anything for anyone, he is so incredibly generous with everything. i have a lot to learn from him. and best of all he makes me laugh all the time - even when he's not around, i start laughing just remembering something he did or said. love that.

i don't want to sound too much like a hallmark card, but i think it's already too late. oh! and he writes me the greatest cards and letters ever. he's an awesome writer and all-in-all amazing communicator - great at drawing stuff out of me, and handling me at my worst. handling me all the time for that matter - best, worst, crazy, quiet, "normal," whatever. my mom made the comment that i "wear it on my sleeve" that i love him so much ... i think that's a good thing? ;-)